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2007-03-30

In which I use cheesy noodles as a cry for help…

Geoff’s mom always used to make ham and “cheesy noodles” for Easter dinner. This year I invited his family to our place for Easter. His brother and I had the following e-mail exchange:

From: Megan
Sent: Monday, March 26, 2007 6:05 PM
To: Scott
Subject: Easter

I heard you're coming and bringing the cheesy noodles. That's great!
I'll get back to you with a time and a number of people so you'll know the amount of noodles to make.
Thanks Scott!

From: Scott
Sent: Tue 3/27/2007 12:03 PM
To: Megan
Subject: RE: Easter

No! No! No! I said I would come if there were cheesy noodles. Besides, they are something that has to be made on site.
Come to think of it, my father has the cheesy noodle dish so maybe he should make them.

From: Megan
Sent: Tuesday, March 27, 2007 12:50 PM
To: Scott
Subject: RE: Easter

You can make them here if you want to, I don't mind. We'll probably cook the ham on the stove, so the oven should be relatively free. Just come a little early! It will be fun.
Oh, yeah! Then it will be even more like Val's dinner b/c you'll get to come over and cook! (I won't wear my nightgown though -- well, maybe if you're really nice!)
;)

From: Scott
Sent: Tue 3/27/2007 3:54 PM
To: Megan
Subject: RE: Easter

Well can you smoke a cigarette and drop ashes in the cheese sauce? That was the secret ingredient.
Most of the work gets done on the stove top.

From: Megan
Sent: Tuesday, March 27, 2007 3:57 PM
To: Scott
Subject: RE: Easter

Are you sure, b/c I thought that the ashes go in the green beans?!? Check the recipe and get back to me.
Don't worry -- we'll save a burner for you.

You’d think that there would be no need for days worth of e-mails to determine who would make the noodles that take a whole 10 minutes to cook, especially given that I’m sure neither Scott nor I would mind cooking them.

But the men in Geoff’s family are very process oriented. The result, no matter how significant or insignificant, requires the same amount of tortuous debate and verbal jousting. And if you give in without a fight, they get upset. So this back-and-forth will go on until the rational party, i.e. the person who is not a member of Geoff’s family, finally gives in.

This behavior drove my mother-in-law crazy. It drives me crazy. It will most certainly drive any future life partner of Scott’s crazy.

So internet, help me: how do you get a whole family of men to realize that their patterns of behavior are harmful and get them to stop?

I clearly don’t know. I just sent this:

From: Megan
Sent: Friday, March 30, 2007 10:30 AM
To: Scott
Subject: RE: Easter

You can send me the recipe and I’ll make the noodles. Unless you actually plan to do it yourself.